Already Gone

Hello readers and thank you for checking out this weeks’ random thoughts on writing, fishing, or just life in general.  This week I do indeed have something different as I comment on long ago memories which have come back to me this year. I hope you enjoy it!

I’ve been aware of my own mortality since fourth grade.  It was a cool, early-Spring day and the rare occasion that I was walking home from school alone.  Being alone gives you time to think and at that tender age of nine I somehow came upon the deep, philosophical realization that I was the only person in the world who saw with my own eyes.  Previous to this I had the silly notion that everyone else could see, and hear, the world like everyone else did in the same way.  (I  also believed for a short while that people on tv and movies who were injured or killed really were but like I said, I was nine.)  Now I realized that within my own mind, my eyes, my ears, my touch, I was alone and even more frightening, I realized one day I would die.

All of this frightened me into silence for days, unsure how to put into words how I was feeling other than just telling my parents I didn’t want to die.  Fortunately, being young as I was, the mind switches gears quick and before long I learned to turn off that fear hidden deep inside and move on enjoying my life.  I knew I was changed after that as well.  I was still a kid but at the same time I was no longer unaware.  From that day on, even at my young age, I began to really appreciate all the things in my life.  Movies & television, music, even my toys and especially my family and friends had new value for me.  For sure I didn’t value these in the same way I do now, but it was certainly a change for me and I moment of my life I’ve never forgotten.

I’ve reminisced of this often in the past several months.  At least all of 2016 for sure for I’m constantly reminded of my youth lately.  Fond memories of growing up in the 80’s, yet also reminded of the inevitability of growing older and the cost of doing so.

It started in December with the return of Star Wars and the classic, beloved characters of my youth.  Han Solo, Chewbacca, Leia, X-Wings, and of course the legendary Millennium Falcon!  My heart soared seeing these back on the big screen and I felt like a kid again.  Then came the losses of David Bowe, Alan Rickman, and Eagles front man Glenn Frey, all within a short time.

Each of them were a part of my youth either in television like MTv (in the beginning when they showed 24hr music videos) or in movies. I believe Rickman did a musical or two in his time but Bowe and Frey also crossed over into television shows and movies in the 80’s. Glenn Frey in particular left me melancholy for days and I listened to his music, either solo or with the Eagles, for a week straight.

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There were others we lost along the way.  George Kennedy, Vanity, and most recently, Merle Haggard and Prince.  Of these, naturally Prince was the most shocking to my 80’s upbringing and I’ve tuned in to his music for a few days as well.  Granted, many of these artists were active, perhaps even in their prime in the 70’s and before, but they were still very active and popular in my time as well.

The reason I’m writing this now is more of a reminder to me to constantly enjoy the things in life.  My family for sure, but also the little everyday things.  A good song on the radio.  A great performance in tv or movies.  Appreciate them now and every day before they’re gone. I’m also writing for perspective.  The loss of these artists have inspired me to push harder at my own dreams and not to give in to frustrations.  Keep writing!

Hope this wasn’t too much of a downer for my readers this week.  Let me know one of your childhood memories, something that stands out as a potential life-changer for you.  Thanks again for stopping by!

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About Jason A. Meuschke

Happily married, father of four who has always been a dreamer and is finally pursuing those dreams! Follow along and read my silly thoughts as I approach the end of my first novel.
This entry was posted in Am writing, Distractions, Fandom, Reasons to Write, Star Wars, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Already Gone

  1. G. A. Edwards says:

    I enjoyed your blogpost. Deep it is, but a good reminder for everyone to take to time to think about our own time on earth and how we spend it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Holli Meuschkr says:

    I wish I could hug and reassure 9-year-old Jason. I love growing old with you and enjoy our shared memories. Our beliefs sure help us face the future!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Jason. That’s a great post and a wonderful view of the way things are. Thank you for sharing this thought provoking story.

    Liked by 1 person

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